Fixing People vs. Partnering with People October 2024

Hello Reader,

A lot of things have been changing lately.

Most of you know I worked for a very very busy clinic at the end of my career working for insurance companies (ah-hum..I mean “insurance based practice”). I wait, rather impatiently, to just recover from the burn out. But I am learning that it is a much longer journey than I had anticipated.

What I am really proud of is how I have been able to start to see a shift in how I am able to treat.

I learned during my first little brush with coaching this year the: “Karpman Triangle.” And it was hearing glass shattering, I can’t unhear it and I can’t unlearn it.

Its premise is we can often default to three roles- victim, rescuer, and persecutor. It describes what can happen with people in conflict. Someone has a problem, they need someone to blame or someone to rescue them (or both).

It was easy for me to see now how it was so “natural” for me to shift to a rescuer role with my patients. I truly entered the field wanting to fix people, wanting to get rid of their pain.

This year, my goal has really been to partner with my patients, and walk along side them in their often arduous journeys (rather than swooping in and pulling them out).

This last week I had the most amazing visit with a lovely patient.

She came in, “I had that pain that I haven’t had in weeks.”

…My arms go up and cross, my body is in defense- I don’t want to be blamed and have caused this, I want to jump in a fix this… My body so easily defaults to “rescuer.”

Lovely patient says: “I just worked on my breathing and did a few of the things we talked about and the pain became so manageable, like almost gone”

[Glass shattering- no rescuing needed]

We had a meaningful discussion about pain and fear and listening to our bodies.

I feel quite confident for that she will continue to do very well, even after she is done seeing me, even if things get difficult or painful. I suspect she will trust she will have the answers, when to take care and when to pick up the heavier dumbbell. I also bet she picks up her rapidly growing toddler, more frequently will less fear.

And that to me is really what it is all about.

“

Physiotherapy is about the restoration of thoughtless, fearless movement

— Louie Gifford

Resilient Root News

I am rocking and rolling into October with lots of exciting things in my month. If you do have to schedule, please do let me know, I am starting to book into the new year.

I spent the end of September in Atlanta with 625 other pelvic rehab professionals at a conference called “Pelvicon.” It was a total nerd fest and I can’t wait to share with you what I learned.

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